Diligent, Pessimistic Idealism

I was chasing after the wind, but in my sorrow I begin
To see the futility within, I am truly nothing now
It’s all breaking down, breaking

Gone to bed, gone fishing in
A bigger pond than I can swim
Gone over my head in the undertow
Where I’ll wash up nobody seems to know
I guess I could say I gave all that I’ve got
Failure in this world, maybe the next is worth a shot
I guess I could say that I could’ve done worse
Buried myself so deep, don’t bother renting a hearse
I guess there’s always nothing left to give
But I’m too selfish for that

No wait, I'm not
Someone else took that hat
They've been wearin it out
With my initials on the tag
I'd like to sue them for it
But the paperwork could be a little messy
'Cause they look just like me

I was me once this week for about ten minutes
Lost it in a second, but I'd gained it in an instant
So who am I now to reconcile this dysfunction
Call me out, call me out, and then file an injunction
'Cause I will, yes I will, cause harm to this intruder, this false face
I'll rip his heart out of his chest and feed it to him on a paper plate
Then microwave his brains till they explode into black rainbows
(You better wear a hazmat suit; it's ugly when a brain blows)
I'm not kidding, I'm so serious, I'm sweatin it
The color of a life with too many regrets in it

I have to do this now, I will stand up before these witnesses
I scream in all their faces, you have no idea just what a witness is
Your majesty, your crown is made of plastic
Mr. President, your house is built on coke
If you ask me why I'm angry, you'll be so sorry that you asked it
Because I'll tell you the answer, I did it all for hope.

Bleed it, b-b-bleed it, bleed it, bleed it
B-b-bleed it, bleed it, bleed
B-b-bleed it or die trying
Bleed it, b-b-bleed it, bleed it, bleed it
B-b-bleed it, bleed it, bleed
B-b-bleed it or die trying

I'd rather die living than live dying