"In the Uncertainty of Beating Hearts"

I don’t know what to do
In all honesty
I’m shattered by it
This hurts
So much
And I knew it would happen
But I don’t know what to do

Have I been
Lying to myself
This whole time
Filling up my heart
With chemical emotions
Just to watch it shatter
And to spill its contents out
In pitiful and unpitiable recitations

Because it’s not
Not just
Not just this time
Not just this time around
Not just some small issue
Something new
Upon which
To agree
To disagree

No
There’s something here
Under the surface
That hurts
So much
When we’re standing
On two opposite sides
Of the mirror
And something
Is fogging up the glass

So, yeah
I don’t know what to do
I never knew about much of anything
You surprised me
You surprise me
Every single time
Every word you say
And I love you for it
But this
This hurts
So much
And this was a big surprise
That I kind of expected
But I just
I don’t know what to do