Pavlov's Bell

Get your head out of the casket and let it start to mend
Got a basket-case for a best friend
And likely I don't see an end
But I suppose it all depends

Can't tell if he's throwing rocks
to get your attention or break your house down
either way i suppose, who knows
his intentions don't matter too much right now

Suspected Arson

I sat quiet and bit my lip
Leaned in and clenched my fists
Blinked back the tears and gripped
The edge of my seat as you recounted
Every tale of the things he did
Every touch for his every whim
All ashamed but all for him
Just to feel wanted

Careful not to turn your back
You look around for a surprise attack
With every window painted black
In a new town that you almost trusted
Run from sleep for your haunted dreams
Fingerprints on your blood-stained sleeves
Turned your heart into a crime scene
Just to feel wanted

Heroes died for their dark desire
Love is lost in the arson’s fire
Body-bags for the dreams departed
A crime scene for the broken-hearted
Move away, every touch is murder
We would never want to hurt her
What do we see when we’re confronted
With all we do just to feel wanted

if i go, let me go

i'm a shame for this dreaming
never sleeping, only drifting
i'm to blame for the keeping
of my macabre memories
i'm in touch with the distance
both the craving and the filling
every empty, yet for hoping
in the vastness of my time
the abyss that calls a name
and calls me great, that lays in wait
to break me at the knees
and cheat my lungs for breathing

as i am an only son
trying to balance my own equations
living inside an awkward obelisk at tilt
like a bed sheet where blood spilt reminisces of a time
when reason had its own and not was built but rhyme couldn't fix

but now i am a cut out
a sticker with no glue
i tried to hold to everything
and held too much
each taking more than it gave
till i gave out

but now i wish for nothing
no dreams, no hopes, no plans
but to disappear into the sound
the simple shapes and colors
that first taught us truth and beauty
before we defined it all

for then will i be free
when i can no longer see behind me
but that which pushes me onward

Simply Stay

I'm alone but never lonely says the stranger

Hand on my shoulder with a welcome sort of frown

He's the captain of his own destiny

On a wayward journey somehow homeward bound

Waiting for his ship to come before he drowns, he downs another round

If you're out there would you listen to what I have to say

I know it's not much but it's everything that I am today

Give me a moment and then you can be off and on your way

I know I'm not much but it would mean everything to me if you would simply stay

I've got too much to do today she says smiling

But there's a pain behind her eyes that could stop time

She's got dreams the size of galaxies

But somehow nobody every sees the beauty of her mind

Longing for a way to rewind, she finds some solace memorizing scripted lines

If you're out there would you listen to what I have to say

I know it's not much but it's everything that I am today

Give me a moment and then you can be off and on your way

I know I'm not much but it would mean everything to me if you would simply stay

And I'll pass by once again

Caught inside my winding thread

Knots of thoughts of what I've got and what I'm not

Myself wishing for a friend

Thinking of how much pain could end

And joy could be found in the time it takes to stop

When the buildings and the billboards crumble down

And all the stages are flattened to the ground

When we stand, we stand so tall, but when we fall, we fall so far

And we find out who we are

When one voice can echo among billions

And when billions can echo into one

If you're out there would you listen to what I have to say

I know it's not much but it's everything that I am today

Give me a moment and then you can be off and on your way

I know I'm not much but it would mean everything to me if you would simply stay

Friends Have Fingers that Drag Me to Gravesides

i will not turn my head

my dream of you is soft and porous now

golden glimmers fleck off with time

and we will not shake like friends

but hold our shoulders stiff

because it's cheaper now

purity and innocence

jokes for our sarcastic charms

like soldiers making necklaces

of the children's fingers

recalling the crunch of their heads under the wheels

of the armored convoy

led ever on by a higher up

an officer named Maturity

and when we get out

we'll write a letter from home

saying, I miss battle

things make more sense when you're killing Time

it was my favorite enemy

then you'll die and place

a flag for whoever they are

so they get remembered and not you

then you'll walk around picking flowers

and talk to me like we're still alive

"let's sell the flowers at market today"

"what a profit we'll make," i'll say

repeating the familiar colloquialism

and the color will drain from my face

like a portrait of a silent film actor

left with a fade to black and the words on my lips written

in white

"What have I become?"