Perpendicularity

And still you stay the only one
Whose eye, if caught, I'd dote upon
Whose heart, once sought, spins so undone
And ever on and on
For you know the cracks in my foundation
Like rain
Like the ice which stretches me ever more
In the winters of my madness
In the depths of my delusion
You madden and soothe
You drive and pause
Your sparks so wildly light new fires
Yet never vain in their eruption
Bits of ash and heat and light
There is always higher, they say
Crackling like miniature thunder claps
Never louder than your joy
Never more captivating than your freedom

Understated

Love is currency
Sex utility
I guess I've gotten used to
The ways you're using me
Of your insincerity
I mean this sincerely
You can go ahead and
Fuck yourself without me

Shatter the Tendons of Some Amateur Aneurism and Shuffle the Razor Blades like a Fixed Deck Fiasco

I am the corporate lie you tell yourself to sleep at night

The constant sigh of rolling eyes and changing subjects

I reject your reclamation

I am the corners of your station

I am the comb that scrapes the scalp of a corpse

Suited up and made up to excuse your remorse

I am the hum you hear when you’re alone in the dark

And the sweat down your neck and your aching heart

I am the mites on the eyebrow raised in question

The timbre of a laugh masking your indiscretion

I am fear like the lock of a toilet that won’t work

I am near you, never touching, but always moving closer

I am the itch that you can’t scratch, but you want to

Yeah you need to, but you won’t, you 

Do what you have to and say it’s enough

I’m the violence on your TV that makes you feel tough

I am the catch in your breath like a sex scene in a PG-13 film 

you went to see with your mom

I am the comeback in the shower that always comes out in real life wrong

I am the sand or the soggy sock in your shoe

I am everything you hate when you see a picture of you

I am the common denominator in all your failed relationships

And yet you still think that this time it won’t be the same old shit

I am the tissue that rips, the heel that trips, the friend who admits

They haven’t liked you for years

If you haven’t figured out yet, I’m the you who gives into your fears

I am unstoppable, unwatchable, unquenchable, uncomfortable

I am the lie they told the teacher that got you in trouble at school

I am the ache of indifference, the soap scum of addictions 

I am a cancerous growth that shows up in your fictions
I’ll grow and grow and grow until you believe your convictions

Then list all your faults and failures while you lie in bed and must listen

I am the allergic reaction, the coward’s inaction, the dissatisfaction

The apathy of an abundance of distractions

I’m in your room, I’m in your clothes, I stink like only you can

I’m a steady, beating reminder of all that remains uncertain

I’m in your bloodstream or crawling up your neck

I am the stubbed toe of affects 

affecting your feckless treks with freckled effects

I am carnivorous, insatiable, immense and bruised and bloated

I am the nail between your nail and your finger and I linger

I am burnt popcorn, methane, ethanol, monoxide, manure

MANSIONS FULL

I’m a spore that lodges in your nose hair 

A rash that appeared out of nowhere

I’m THAT regret, yeah you know the one.

It's Not the Missing You

It's not the missing you
It's the not knowing you anymore
It's the ties that once bound
      Like we were two mountaineers
And the horizon so infinite
      Clouds like our fingers stretching and entangling
      And how the air thins up so high
Befit our grand endeavors
Our hope unending
The possibility
Of dreams
When a dreamer believes
In another
      And wonders upon wonders
A cycle of anything
Specifically everything
The ties that once bound
Turn frail in time
Like bodies do
Sucked dry of optimism
In an age of trauma
When the questions of morality
And substance
Hide their volcanic biding
No, time is no healer
And it is the missing you
It's always missing you